I have officially started my job as an Au Pair! I am now on Day 3, the kids are napping, and I am sipping on some coffee. Sounds pretty nice, right? It definitely has it's perks but it has been a rather difficult week so far. Not a bad week, just difficult. In case you do not know, or if you have forgotten, I am an Au Pair for two kids: Auggi, a two-year-old little boy, and Vicki, 3-month-old baby girl. Both are very adorable, but Auggi is in his "terrible twos" and Vicki is still young enough that as long as she gets to eat, sleep, and poop, all is well with the world. Last night I took care of Vicki by myself while the parents went to the country club with Auggi for a few hours. We had a pleasant evening and she was a perfect little Princess! She is a very happy baby and she only cries to let you know that she is hungry.
Auggi, on the other had, has been quite the opposite of a "happy baby." Not only is he in his "terrible twos" but he is going through a lot of changes. He has been with his Mom and Dad every day for several months because Mom has been on maternity leave and Dad is a school teacher out for summer break. Now Mom and Dad are getting ready to go back to work and there is a strange lady who now LIVES in his house that he is expected to obey and bond with. He his a little stressed out about all of this and I cannot say I really blame him. As the stranger in the house that has left her own home and everything she knows to come be apart of a new family, well, its stressful! Unfortunately, I don't get to scream and throw tantrums when I am feeling unsettled. Haha! Well, I suppose I could, but that would be a very unwise thing to do and I don't think my job would last very long.
For this week and most of next week the parents will be around the house so they can help me out a bit. I am very grateful for this because there is a lot that I need to learn about the house, the village, the kids, etc. However, I think this is also why Auggi is being so difficult. Once Mom and Dad aren't around he won't have any choice but to have to "deal" with me. Luckily, I won't have him all day every day. He will only be solely in my care on Mondays, Tuesday afternoons, and Wednesdays. Of course, we will be around each other more than that, but so will other people, or he will be at "nounou's" house or daycare. Vicki will go to Nounou everyday and come home in the evening with the parents. I think the schedule will be good for everyone so that we are not overly exhausted with one another. My biggest fear before coming was that I might get burnt-out on day after day child care, but I think this schedule will keep me busy but also give me time to have my own life.
Speaking of fear, I did a lot of research on the Au Pair lifestyle before I came to France and I do not remember reading anything that I found particularly alarming. There were horror stories but most of them were from the side of the Host Family, therefore, I should have no reason to worry because I knew I was not a slob, a threat, a liar, etc. I have continued to do some reading after coming here and for some reason I have a found A LOT more alarming stories but this time from the side of the Au Pair. While reading through some of these I found myself with my hand clasped over my mouth in astonishment at the horrendous experiences some of these poor girls endured. Why did I not come across any of this before now? Maybe it is a good thing because if I had, I might have been too frightening to go through with it. Well, not true, but I would have been a lot more nervous than I was! So far, I feel quite sure that I made a wise choice in my Host Family and that I will not have to experience any of the things I read. I am sure you are curious, aren't you?
Here are some examples:
1) The Au Pair life/job is often referred to as, "modern day slave trade." Yes. It can be that bad.
2) Many Au Pairs are required to be "invisible" with their family. This means she is not allowed to eat with them but instead must eat in the kitchen while they eat in the dining room, or even eat in her bedroom.
3) Many Au Pairs are required to not only take care of the children but to cook and serve all of the meals and do housework. Often times the Au Pair is told it will only be "light housework" such as cleaning up after the children or helping the parents clear the table after meals, but she ends up scrubbing floors and toilets, doing all of the laundry, all of the shopping, etc. Oh, and did I mention that she is rarely ever paid extra for these duties?
4) Many Au Pairs are often stuck working well over full-time and not being paid extra OR being given additional holiday time.
5) Some Au Pairs have had to miss their language classes because of the schedule she is assigned, and this is illegal and a breach of the contract signed to acquire the Visa.
6) Some Au Pairs have been required to keep secrets such as an affair that one of the parents may be having.
7) Some Au Pairs have had to deal with a drunken father hitting on her when the mother is not around. One Au Pair that I read about even experienced the father climbing into bed with her after he came home drunk.
8) Many Au Pairs have been required to wear a certain uniform and parade around the parent's friends and co-workers like a trophy slave. Some aren't even allowed to look the parents in the eye... they are to keep their head down.
These are just a few examples. Horrible, isn't it? I am so glad that I did not read any of this before coming to France. I have no concerns that any of this will happen to me. So far, my Host Family has been very kind and welcoming. I do not think they will take advantage of me in any way, especially since I don't even have to clean my own bedroom or bathroom. We have a housekeeper that comes twice a week and she will do it for me. Kinda cool, huh? I mean, I will be tidy but I don't have to do any scrubbing or anything. This is definitely a new experience for me! I do help them with meals but to me, that is perfectly normal and polite because even if I were an unpaid house guest I would help with such things. So far, I feel confident that this will be a great experience.
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