The Entitled Millennials

The entitled millennials. As much as I hate to admit it, it is so true.  Should I even be writing about this? I mean, after all, I am a millennial. I think yes, because who better to tell the truth than someone who is right in the middle of the situation at hand?

Before I go any further let me just say that much of our sense of entitlement  is not entirely our fault. Our parents and grandparents worked hard to be able to give us everything that we have. They followed the American Dream so that we could have things they never could and so that we would have ample opportunities to pursue our careers. Unfortunately, the "American dream" has started to blow up in our face, but we are the Special Snowflakes so we shouldn't have to deal with this, right? Mommy and Daddy told you in high school and college that your "job" was just to get good grades, right? Your Mommy probably has all of your You're a Winner Because You Participated trophies above the mantel and you know she saved all of your A's for effort. Therefore, you don't really know how to deal with the unforeseen complications of what it really means to be an adult. While our parents worked hard to provide a good life for us, in many ways it was easier for them than it is for us. Things were much more simple. For one thing, when they were getting started in life they didn't have cell phone bills. HAHA! On top of that it actually meant something to have a college degree. If you went to University you were fairly well set up to find a good full-time job with benefits. This is no longer the case. We all know this.

So, here is my point: life is still hard, if not harder than it was for our parents, but because we grew up so entitled we do not understand the work it takes to continue to have what we have always had. We thought it would be as easy as doing our home work after school every evening. The homework we got praise for doing even though it was required and everyone else had to do it too. Good job! Go you!

How to spot the entitled millennial behavior:

1) You're tired of adulting.
2) You just want to be a mermaid.
3) You need 12 shots of espresso before you can speak to anyone.
4) You prefer to "netflix n chill" rather than be forced to socialize.
5) You understand that having to wake up before noon is a terrible injustice.
6) You're way more intelligent and competent than your boss.

Sounds familiar, doesn't it? While the above examples may not describe you, personally, you know that is describes a large percentage of your Facebook friends. If they aren't posting their smart-ass humor on their wall you can certainly find it all over their Pinterest account. For millennials, it seems to be funny to be a lazy jerk who simply wants to escape any or all adult responsibilities. Millennials are the only ones who get to "check out" of the real world to go rest and find out who they really are. A millennial can totally walk away from from all responsibility and claim it is for their mental health and no one bats an eye. That it what I call entitled. Think about it. Our grandparents did not get to mentally check-out of WWII. Those who fought in Vietnam did not get to come home and stop "adulting." Many people who struggle from abuse or depression still have to keep their jobs and pay their bills even though it would be really nice to just STOP and go take a yoga class or backpack around the country for some peace and self-exploration. Millennials gripe and complain about everything without stopping to think, "hey, maybe if I dial back on the Starbucks spending or video games, I could use that time and money to create better opportunities for myself."

Unfortunately, I am guilty of having millennial entitlement just like everyone else, but I am learning that this attitude is not that of someone with goals such as mine, and I must change it. While I really hate the word, "adulting" I have to admit that sometimes I sit back and think, "wow, this really is harder than I thought it would be." I am not entirely sure what I expected, but I didn't expect it to be like this.

Taking a step back, lets talk about our college degrees. We are the first generation where getting a college degree is the next expected step for us. For our parents, and especially our grandparents, getting a college degree was a huge deal! Unlike many of my friends, both of my parents have degrees and got good jobs immediately after graduation. Somehow, I expected the same thing to happen to me. However, times have changed. Essentially everyone goes to college now. So, now we are faced with new problems that our parents did not face such as, "my degree is in Theatre and really doesn't count for much." Yeah, that one is all me. I chose my field of study because I loved it and I had this dumb idea where I thought if I did what I loved everything would eventually work itself out. I am not saying you shouldn't do what you love, but my millennial entitlement caused me to forget that sometimes you still have to do things you don't like in order to be successful... or you know, just pay the bills! I do not think my degree is completely useless and I certainly learned a lot of valuable information through my courses, but I am not exactly set up for the path I now wish to take. Not on paper, anyway. To be honest, I no longer have a great love for theatre. I will always love it to a certain extent, but not enough to pursue a career and unfortunately, I discovered these feelings a little too late. I am not the only one. Even those who don't feel regret towards their degree of choice find that their careers are not fulfilling, if they've even landed a job in their field to begin with. But because of our millennial entitlement we whine about it instead of continuing to work towards our goals.

Of course, if your goals are entirely centered around your career then that could possibly be part of the problem. There is a balance between our careers and the rest of our lives and I find that us millennials have a hard time maintaining that balance. It's all or nothing, and because of our entitlement a lot us opt for the free-spirited lifestyle of never settling down, never saving money, and forgetting that we are getting older. It takes a lot of money to survive and it takes even more to live as comfortably as you always thought you would, even if your idea of living comfortably simply meant owning a home, staying debt free, and having a young 'un or two. Times have changed, and we must change with the times.

We line up for the new iPhone every year and mark our calendars for PSL season. We spend hours on social media blabbing about everything from bad traffic and our tasty lunch to hollywood couple drama and Donald Trump's orange skin. We spend hundreds or even thousands of dollars on gym memberships, new iPads and laptops, FitBits (because we are so lazy we need our watch to remind us how little we get off our butt and move), and every other new trinket that comes around the corner. This is why "adulting" is so hard and you "just want to be a mermaid." Okay, #shelltits (thanks for that one, Iliza Schlesinger). Maybe if you spent a fraction of the time that you spend whining on actually being an adult it might not feel so miserable.

I have to admit that I am guilty of being the girl that runs to Starbucks for a PSL the minute a dead leaf hits the ground, and I am, in fact, typing this on my beloved MacBook Air with my iPhone 6 sitting next to me. All while wearing my cute plum colored FitBit HR. I am guilty. I am not pointing fingers without realizing that I am in the same boat as the rest of you. So, what are you going to do? In order to get your college degree you took out loans and now you're swimming in debt and you've barely gotten started in life. Its not fair, no, but its how things are. Thanks, Baby Boomers.

Let me break it down a little more. In the early 1900s women fought hard for the right to vote. It was kind of a big deal.  In 1964 we had the Civil Right Act which prohibited the segregation of black and white people in schools. These were huge changes for the American people but do you think they were easy? I think not. Unfortunately, we still have a long way to go when it comes to racism, equality, etc.  However, if we sit back and whine about how hard it is to be an adult then we have nowhere to go except backwards. Not to be too dark but the Baby Boomers will start dying off before too long and that leaves us in charge. How are you going to feel about being an adult then? Look at it this way, America is the country of entrepreneurs. The go-getters, the business builders, the fighters. We have come a long way from the founding of the country. We demolished slavery (at least, legally), women can own land and vote, and gay marriage is finally legally. Regardless of your personal views on any of these issues we fought to make changes that were to benefit the people of our country and it doesn't stop now. There is still much work to be done. For you, your children, and your children's children. Can you imagine what it would be like if our parents said, "I'm tired of adulting" and just sat back and did nothing?

I believe that our sense of entitlement has blinded us from realizing how hard we have to work to continue to grow and flourish. 

When in Rome....


Two weeks ago I was in Rome, Italy and it was wonderful. Emilie, Guillaume, and I all agreed that it was the most magnificent city we have ever seen. Literally. Even if you're not a history lover there is no way you could not fall in love with Rome!

I was able to take this delightful weekend adventure because Emilie was invited to a party of a co-worker... at a castle on the outskirts of Rome. Talk about awesome. It was an all-expenses-paid and work-free family trip for me! Again, talk about awesome. The only "work" I had to do was stay at our apartment in the city center on the night of the party. In the beginning, I was going to join Emilie and Guillaume for the party but we decided that the kids should stay and go to bed early and that I would stay with them, of course. So, it wasn't actually work but I didn't go to the party. However, I had pizza and wine from the little pizzeria below our apartment and watched Netflix in my bed. I was totally fine, I promise.

So, our apartment: we rented a little place above a pizzeria in the center of Rome. It was SO CUTE.

It had two bedrooms, a tiny "living room," bathroom, kitchen, and study/entryway. As I said, it was above a pizzeria so it was a bit noisy at night but that can hardly be avoided in Rome. The streets come alive at night and many of the apartments are nestled in these busy streets above bars, restaurants, shops, etc. 

We were only there for Friday night - Sunday night so we could not possibly see and do everything that we wanted, so to avoid the stress I spoke of in my last post (not experiencing the adventure fully due to a short amount of time) we mostly wandered around the city to see what we would run into. We did not try to do anything specific because of the short amount of time and the fact that we had a 2-year-old and 4-month-old with us. They can get cranky at any moment. Overall, the kids actually did pretty well. It was a bit warmer than I would have liked, and I would love to spend more time there but it was a wonderful weekend.

We saw some beautiful sites including:

Piazza Navona

The Colosseum: 

The Trevi Fountain:

The tradition with the Trevi Fountain is the stand with your back facing the water and toss a coin with your right hand over your left shoulder and it will ensure your return to Rome! I tossed a coin for a sweet friend of mine who is actually from Italy but currently living in the states. 

For you coffee lovers: the espresso is "delizioso!" The one pictured is actually a lungo, believe it or not. I liked to call it, "tiny mouse coffee." You can order an "American coffee" but its still going to be pretty small. Haha. 

Guillaume got Augustin to give me a kiss in front of the fountain! Isn't he sweet? He took his hat off and everything. Such a little gentleman. 

View from our window. 

I took a lot of pictures which I have uploaded to my Facebook but there are far too many to use here. Unfortunately, none of the pictures do the city justice. However, the city is probably much like you imagine: tiny roads with tons of people "flying" around on vespas, everyone is smoking cigarettes and drinking espresso, the smell of pizza and pasta wafting around every corner, and yes, it's pretty dirty. If you wear sandals your feet will be black by the end of the day.

 I was worried about pick-pockets but luckily did not encounter any. However, I did see a man running with his arms full of tapestries that he had stolen from a street vendor. A small part of me wanted to chase after him but I refrained. The only mishap we had was that Emilie accidentally broke the key of our apartment in the lock of the door the led out to the street! After about an hour Guillaume and I were able to dig it out with some knives. No big deal. Haha. 

Anyway, if you read my last post you may be wondering about how I said I didn't like traveling for short amounts of time and then suddenly I go to Rome for only three days. Well, while I still feel the way I did a few weeks ago (haha) but I feel that I should remind you that my flight to Rome was only an hour. I have driven much further for shorter amounts of time back in the states. Also, flights here can be crazy cheap if you look in the right place.  I can literally fly to Morocco and back for 50 euros!  Of course, I didn't have to pay for this flight but if I want to go back for another weekend it will be very feasible concerning finances. If you're coming from the States and have to fly 10+ hours and fork out a $2k, then yes, stay for a few weeks. Heck, stay for a month! There is something fantastic around every corner! 

While I feel that this post is short and choppy, I have things to do and must bring it to a close. Y'all stop by again soon! I'll update again shorty. 

Finding Adventure

When I was growing up I never thought much about traveling. In fact, when I did think about it I was not very interested in the idea. Now, here I am, living in France! I never would have believed that I would want to do this. Many (if not all) of my family and friends always talked about seeing the world. They talked about all of the adventures they wanted to have when they were older. Some of them have had some great adventures. My sister has been to England, Scotland, and Greece. Some of my cousins have been to Ireland, England, etc. Mostly English speaking countries, I believe. However, I could be wrong! I was never envious of their travels. I was not interested, or at least I didn't realize I was.

When I was growing up my family took a vacation every fall. We went to Texas, Colorado, Ohio, Virginia, West Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Kentucky, etc. Basically, anywhere with mountains and where we could go hiking! My mum loved hiking! We would complain a lot but we loved it. I guess this is why I love mountains so much. As long as I am in/near the mountains I am fairly content.

Above:

 My family in CO, 1999. My dad was there too, but he was the one taking the picture! 

I always loved our family vacations. We would leave at 4am while it was still dark, chilly, and dew on the ground. We piled in our minivan with our pillows, blankets, headphones, cassette players or portable CD players. We were always too excited to go back to sleep. Sounds fun, right? It was until someone farted, slapped you, or put their stuff on "your land." Then it was a fine for the "Gripe Jar." Basically, we all had a designated seat in the van and it was OUR spot. We were a bunch of little Sheldon Coopers. If we argued or pestered one another we risked putting a quarter in the Gripe Jar. No one wanted to lose their money, but it was glorious when someone else did because the person with the best behavior won the money at the end! The worse someone else behaved the more money you made. What a great system. 

Anyway, enough about that. I liked traveling, I suppose, but I never thought I had any desire to leave my own country. Why would I do that? America has everything! Its a huge country filled with opportunity and freedom! Ha. What a precious thought. Of course, one can visit another country without living there, right? I mean, people do it all of the time. Everyday. However, for me, this always seemed a bit useless. I got anxiety at the thought of being in England or France for only a week or two. I could not possibly see and learn everything I wanted in that short amount of time. A short amount of time is better than none, but that it simply not how I operate. I never have. I had three weeks of vacation in Switzerland when I arrived here in Europe and honestly its all a blur! I was so overwhelmed and excited that I couldn't take it in properly. I am sure some of you can relate to that feeling when you travel. I like to experience things as fully and deeply as possible. Every sip of rich, red wine. Every taste of dark, bold coffee. The sensational taste and smell of a well-aged scotch. The cold "tickle" of snow flakes falling. The bright glow of a full moon. The heavenly scent of a burning candle. The warmth from a roaring fire. You get my point? Okay, good, because I am done being a cheesy weirdo. Forgive me, I am but a lowly artist. 

It was not until I was around twenty years old and I moved to Jackson, MS that the desire to experience more of the world was laid on my heart. As many of you may know, I have always loved history and been particularly interested in Russian history. When I moved to Jackson I became friends with several students from Russia, and also came to know a wonderful woman in the theatre world who had recently adopted a little girl from Russia. I thought I would burst from the desire to go there! I ended up having two opportunities to go but both fell apart mostly due to funds. Over the next few years my desire burned a little less but it was still there. Unfortunately, I had a lot of other things to deal with before I could focus on travel. 

As I think back on my desires and actions from most of my life, but particularly since college, I can see that they have all been telling me something. I was very unsettled and always searching. I moved from place to place and idea to idea. I changed drastically every few months. The things that brought me joy were not the things I could find so easily. I turned down three opportunities to get married, one with an actual ring involved. I walked away from each because they were not right for me and I knew I would be unhappy, but there was something else... something extra tugging at my thoughts and my heart. Something was telling me that I was supposed to be somewhere special or do something special and if I settled too quickly I would miss it. I was right. 

In 2014, when I started at UWF to finish my BA I started to truly find myself. I was in a comfortable enough place to let myself be honest with myself and what was actually happening in my life. It was not easy and I had to make some huge changes but I made it happen. It was during this time that I could see an open door. I didn't know where it led but I think that is because I could choose. It could have led anywhere and it was up to me to decide. In 2015, when graduation from UWF was finally approaching, I knew it was time to lay out my next steps. So, I did. I sat down and thought about what I wanted most in the world and what would make me truly happy. The only thing that came to mind was leaving the country. I had no idea where I wanted to go but I knew I wanted to go. I wanted to find a culture that better suited my personality and where I could see more of the beautiful world that I had only ever seen in photographs. It was during this time that I met my current boyfriend, Toby, and all of his friends from around the world who were living in the same city as us. Everything began to unfold and fit together. I made friends with people from Italy, France, Netherlands, Sweden, etc. I was flooded with support and encouragement. I knew I was on the right path. There was no doubt in my mind that I needed to make it happen. It was not easy, but so worth it. 

To those of you who (possibly) wish to follow in my footsteps: be careful. I do not say this because I am unhappy. I am immensely happy. I haven't had the first thought of regret or even been homesick. However, I can see where many people might end up being unhappy. While France suits me perfectly, it is not perfect. You cannot leave your own country expecting perfection elsewhere. I am sure you know this. My point is this: if you truly think I am "lucky" to be here or you feel truly jealous then do it yourself. Not so easily done? You're right! Its not. In fact, it is really, really hard! Depending on where you are in life it may even be harder for you than it was for me. However, I am a firm believer in the old saying, "where there is a will, there is a way." I have had to have a lot of will to get my way... and it didn't stop once I got here! My stamped Visa was only the beginning. 

From getting my first pat-down in the airport for forgetting a pack of gum in my back pocket, learning to drive manual transmission on tiny French mountain roads, finding out I have to have an X-ray to check for tobacco disease (weird rule because of people from Asia and Africa), hitting a tree because I couldn't stop my damn car in time, not being able to contact anyone when away from wifi, my debit card expiring before I had my new one and technically being penniless, discovering that I am allergic to "grocery store bread," and the many language barriers I face everyday, it has not been easy.  However, I am happier than I have ever been in my entire life. I love every minute of this adventure. Find your adventure because it will be the the greatest thing to ever happen to you, no matter how hard it may be.